We Need Some Alone Time

We Need Some Alone Time

Greetings, Lovelies!  Week one of my plan has been accomplished!  I wanted to fall more in love with God.  To do this, I wanted to put into practice some relationship techniques that I am familiar with.  As we know, when you invest your time, money, and energy into something, it is representative of your heart’s focus.  (Where your treasure is, your heart will be also!)  I want my heart to be focused on God!  I want to fall in love with Love Himself!  (If you didn’t catch the first post on this, I encourage you to take a minute to check it out.  It’s entitled “Because of Love.”) 

                  Because my primary love language is Quality Time (Chapman, 2010), I wanted to use this love language first.  It is something familiar to me and a language that I speak fluently.  And now for an honest reflection on week one of my challenge…

                  Ok, totally hard to find time for Quality Time.  (big sigh)  At the start of the week, I had all of this energy and enthusiasm to spend half an hour in praise and worship.  I love, love, love praise and worship time.  It’s practically at the top of my list of important things to have at a church.  I get such a thrill out of basking in God’s presence and feeling the awe of our Creator.  So awesome!  I couldn’t wait to spend some quality time with God over my favorite activity.

                  I started a new job this week and had lots of obligations that I committed to in the evenings.  You know how when you start a new job, your mind seems to be occupied with the new job most of the time?  At least for the first couple of weeks?  Maybe it’s just me.  My mind focused around work, work, and work.  This new job has been a career I’ve been working towards for the last three years.  With my mind on work and my days stretching into the evening with meetings and catching up on my to-do list, finding time to schedule in ½ hour of worship time was very difficult.  I felt horrible about this! 

                  I caught myself several times writing out a to-do list and overlapping chores with worship time, “Well, I can worship while I’m doing the dishes…. God would understand…. I have lots to do!  I just can’t be up late…”  These thoughts made me feel even more horrible!  I can’t take ½ hour to spend time with the Creator of the universe without multitasking over dishes?!?! 

                  I decided to cut some items off of my to-do list.  God was worth this.  He is the best investment.  Dishes can wait.  Besides, didn’t He say He would reward us when we put Him first?  This Quality Time was worth it.  I put on some Hillsong worship songs and started to praise.  In my moment of honesty with you, Folks, I had a difficult time focusing my mind on God.  My mind tried to wander on topics of work, chores, and bedtime.  My heart was in the right place, but taming my mind was tough!  In the midst of my guilt, God reminded me of the devotion message I had read the day before:

“It’s all right to be human.  When your mind wanders while you are praying, don’t be surprised or upset.  Simply return your attention to Me.  Share a secret smile with Me, knowing that I understand.  Rejoice in My love for you, which has no limits or conditions…” (Young, 2004).

                  What a gift of love!  In all of my humanness, God loves me anyways.  Week one was a humbling experience.  On to week two, Friends!  Putting forth Words of Affirmation to practice!  

*More weeks to be posted later. 

*Chapman, G. 2010. The 5 love languages: the secret to love that lasts. Northfield Publishing: Chicago, Illinois.

*Young, Sarah. 2004. Jesus calling. Pg. 24. Thomas Nelson: Nashville, Tennessee.  

Month	January	January	February	February	February
Week Starting	21st	28th	4th	11th	18th
Love Language being used	Quality Time	Words of Affirmation	Gifts	Acts of Service	Physical Touch
How?	Spend half an hour this week alone in “praise and worship” time.	Write God a "love letter."	*To be announced! (Please feel free to share ideas!)	*To be announced!	*To be announced!

        

Because of Love

Note of Thanks

Thank you readers for checking my site or stopping back for a second visit!  As I mentioned in my last post, I used to blog years ago; however, it was for the designated purpose of keeping in touch with loved ones as I lived outside of London teaching.  (http://missenghfromamerica.blogspot.com/) Now being back in Minnesota for a couple of years, I have found that I miss writing.  To be rather transparent, I feel as though I am still getting my feet wet with blog writing.  Thanks for sticking with me as I share my thoughts with you.

Because of Love

Love is a powerful element.  It can knock you off your feet; compel you to act outside of your character; push you to be a better person.  I am surrounded by love: x’s and o’s from my family, uplifting and loving companionship with my friends, and an incredible relationship with the love of my life.  For the moment, I’d like to brag on him for a minute, as this will tie into the purpose of this note.  (Also, I just like to brag on him…)  I am blessed with an amazing relationship with my boyfriend of over two years.  J still surprises me with flowers and treats me to dinners.  I can share anything with J without feeling judged or questioned.  Our strong relationship is the result of plenty of effort and time spent in relationship maintenance.  J and I will occasionally do a “check-in” with each other.  These “check-in” times give each of us a chance to give honest feedback about our relationship.  We are especially fond of catering to each other’s primary love languages.  J knows that I need quality time with him in order to feel loved and admired.  I make sure that I verbalized to J the things that I admire about him.  It is through this method of communication that we can maintain a high level of trust and security.  I love, love, love making J feel like he is the center of my little world!  We are a great team!  Yet, it is important to remember that teamwork takes effort in order to become stronger.

Any relationship is an investment.  Many studies have shown that interpersonal relationships are critical factors in happiness.  If time spent with others brings happiness, it is probably safe to say that for most, putting effort into relationships is a worthwhile cause.  I know that when I invest into my friendships or into my relationship with J the result is so very worth the time. 

During church one Sunday, I was sitting listening to the sermon when I was reminded of how our first love should be God. (Matthew 6:33; Exodus 20:3) Your first love is where you invest yourself.  Where do you invest your time?  Your money? (Matthew 6:21)  I thought to myself, “Gosh!  I really try to put God first… I do my devotions twice a day, I try to talk to God throughout the day, I try to speak His word, I listen to Christian music, I go to church… why do I feel as though I could be doing more?”  Admittedly, seeking God first in all things is a lot more difficult when in a relationship.  Especially a relationship in which you are head-over-heels-crazy-in-love!  Priorities do not always fall where they should, despite my best efforts…

The Brain Whoosh

So there I was, sitting in church pondering these things when <whoosh!>  I was hit with a wonderful brain whoosh. 

Brain whoosh 

Noun 

1 The event in which a sudden idea hits the cerebrum at such force one’s mouth often is left a gap. 

2 Nicknamed by an amazing group of 2^nd graders.

           

God deserves my greatest affection.  My heart and energy.  Love is a verb.  I need to demonstrate my love for Him more.  But how?  If I wanted to reframe my thinking about loving God and putting Him first, I needed to fall back onto something familiar.  I would need to use something that would require my thoughts and time as an investment.  It must be something that needed my efforts to go the extra mile… the five love languages was just the ticket.  J and I used these frequently.  Since I have read several of the books by Chapman on the subject, I feel pretty well versed in the subject area.

The Theory

            For those that are unfamiliar with Gary Chapman’s theory, I will briefly explain it. Chapman hypothesizes that we each have an emotional need for love.  If it can be imagined, we each have, as Chapman describes, a “love tank” that needs to be filled.  Individuals show love in five different ways, which can be thought of as five different languages: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch.  We each have a primary love language that is a bit more meaningful to us that will fill our “love tank.”  (Chapman, 2010). Gary Chapman’s books are amazing.  He intertwines psychology, research, and experience beautifully in his books.  His ideas are practical and worth the time to check out.

The Plan

            “…God is love.” (1 John 4:8)  If God is love itself, focusing on a primary love language is not necessary.  The purpose of utilizing the love language theory is that it requires effort and it is familiar to me.  The time I spend in putting the love languages theory into practice in my relationship with God will hopefully aid in refocusing my attention on my first love.  From now until Easter, I am going to choose 1 love language a week and implement it as an add-on to my preexisting lifestyle.  My hope is that taking the extra effort to actively demonstrate my love for God will deepen my affection for Him. I am going to start with quality time, as it is my primary love language. You are more than welcome to join me in this plan.  I will be sharing with you how this plan works and if it helps me fall (even more!) head-over-heels in love with the Maker of the universe.  Please feel free to share ideas or things you do to keep God as your main focus and love.  

Here’s the plan, folks!

Month	January	January	February	February	February
Week Starting	21st	28th	4th	11th	18th
Love Language being used	Quality Time	Words of Affirmation	Gifts	Acts of Service	Physical Touch
How?	Spend half an hour this week alone in “praise and worship” time.	*To be announced! (Please feel free to share ideas!)	*To be announced!	*To be announced!	*To be announced!

*More weeks to be posted later. 

*Chapman, G. 2010. The 5 love languages: the secret to love that lasts. Northfield Publishing: Chicago, Illinois.